From Crying in the Forest to Thriving in the Forest
I find myself not wanting to share much anymore and just wanting to do art- but that would defeat the purpose of this whole brand.. so I digress for now!
This past weekend, my partner + his family and I had a getaway in the woods. I love being out in nature & didn't realize how many negative memories I had associated with it. I'll never forget the day I was sobbing driving myself several hours from my home to the woods up north after being reprimanded like a little kid, trying to appease someone else & the situation. That was a hard trip on me mentally & physically and would be the beginning of a spiral of (probably anxiety induced) health issues. As that was a frequented spot, I made many more trips up there, always walking on eggshells and typically starting with a pit in my stomach.
When my partner and I started driving up this weekend (I haven't really been back up there since), some of those anxious feeling started to manifest. I am so grateful to now have the most supportive, patient, kind, all of the above partner who I was able to word vomit to about my anxiousness that was creeping up. I did not realize it until now, but the people you are attached to make a world of difference with your general day to day anxiousness. Thanks to hours of work put in to cognitive behavioral therapy, I was able to understand that these anxious feelings I was feeling have no grounds to pop up & I was okay sitting with them. It makes the world of a difference that I can tell my partner my train of thought and feel safe.
Lo and behold we made it and I had the best time like i rationally knew I would. I'm so happy i was able to control alt delete old memories & replace them with these. A long story with the moral being you CAN do things that once brought you anxiety and you can have a fun time doing it. Even if it stirs up old anxious feelings, which it most likely will, know that they cannot hurt you - don't try to get rid of them, let them sit with you until they dissipate themselves.
The people you surround yourself matter.
P.s. I try to be as discrete as possible as I know ppl can read this, but also F*** it.
